Behavior Management and the Acting Out Cycle

Classroom Management During the Holidays

Feeling stressed? It would not be surprising! During December, it’s hard to avoid the intensity of the holiday season – whether you celebrate or not. Psychologists tell us that anxiety can exist within systems of people, not just individuals, so that even if you are not particularly stressed out yourself, you can absorb the stress that’s in the environment. And so can children, of course, which makes a difficult situation in our classrooms.
 
The most important strategy to combat the holiday pressure is to recognize the extra stress and try not to let it take over the classroom. Children will have a lower tolerance for frustration, they will be triggered more easily, and you will likely have less patience. Here are some practical suggestions for having a peaceful, and hopefully productive holiday season in your classroom:

1. Slow down. Leave extra time, especially for transitions which are likely to trigger conflict.
2. Have group relaxation moments. Quiet the class down and lead the children through your favorite breathing exercises. Have them relax their shoulders and legs, and visualize a peaceful place. You don’t need more than a couple of minutes and this is especially effective first thing in the morning, right after lunch or recess, and before packing up at the end of the day.
3. Observe your children for signs of agitation – nail biting, tapping, rocking, facial changes, etc. When you see this, try to redirect them for a minute or two by getting a drink of water, stretching, or just a pat on the back. Remember the acting out cycle and don’t let the agitation build with intensity and move to acceleration phase.
4. Keep the daily schedule consistent, even though you may have to interrupt it with more assemblies, parties, visitors, etc.
5. Monitor your own tone of voice. Smile frequently, even if you don’t feel like it, and keep an eye on the tension in your own body. Take more frequent breaks if you can. If you are working with another teacher, make an effort to give each other quick breaks throughout the day.
6. Take the children outside. In northern climates, children get less time outside as we move through December. Their need to move, breathe fresh air, and feel the freedom of outdoor play is decreased just when the stress increases. Even though it might be getting cold, be sure to give the children time outside.
7. Have some fun with your children! Plan some movement games, special story readings, creative art projects, or songs to build community and remind the children that school can also be joyful.

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THE ACTING OUT CYCLE

It may often seem that children's tantrums, hitting, fighting, or other challenging behaviors come out of nowhere. In actuality, there is a cycle that children go through when they act out and this can be predictable. Sometimes, it just happens so quickly it may be hard to recognize. Understanding this cycle helps us to know how to intervene and when.

     I highly recommend the IRIS Center for Training Enhancements that has a detailed training module for teachers on the acting out cycle. Today, I will highlight some of the major points that can help teachers of young children.

     Here's a diagram that the IRIS Center uses to describe the acting out cycle:

     From this diagram, you can see that children start out at a Calm Phase. Typically something happens in the child's environment that acts as a trigger that begins the acting out cycle. This trigger could be something at school like being told it's clean up time, transitioning to a math lesson, coming back from lunch, another child coming too close, etc. Other triggers can come from outside of school: being hungry, tired, having a chaotic morning at home, an argument on the bus, and so on.

     So the first strategy a teacher can use is to help the child avoid or manage his triggers. For example, if you know that Kevin tends to get angry and hit children when the class is coming in from recess, you can use some prevention strategies such as asking Kevin to come in for a special job ahead of the rest of the class. Or you can walk next to Kevin, engaging him in conversation as you enter the classroom. If you know that Jenny begins to have tantrums at the beginning of clean-up time, you can give her early notice that center time is ending, or get her to stop ahead of the other children and then give her a job to do - like watering the plants -  that is away from all the movement during clean up time.

     Next in the acting out cycle is the Agitation Phase. In my view this is the critical phase. At this point, children's emotions and behaviors begin to gain energy. If you are attuned to this phase, you may notice nail biting, hair twirling, tapping, wiggling, inability to sit still, a lack of focus, or daydreaming. Some children will clench their fists, or their jaw, making a grimace or showing frustration on their face. It is at this point when intervention by the teacher is most effective and most necessary. Your goal in the agitation phase is to restore calm, otherwise the child will move into the acceleration phase and can become out of control. It's especially important NOT to yell at the child or add to their growing tension with lecturing or reprimands.

     Calming a child in the agitation phase can be as simple as moving your body close by, giving some focused attention on the child, or redirecting the child toward a different activity. Here are some examples:

    4-year old Carmen is playing in the housekeeping area and two other girls move close to her to play with the kitchen items. Carmen makes an angry face and starts to push their things off the table. You quickly walk over and engage Carmen in a conversation about her play. She starts to relax and smile so you make suggestions about playing together with the other girls.

    Let's imagine a 2nd grade classroom. You've just finished guided reading and the children are going back to their desks to start journal writing. Michael, who is typically overwhelmed by writing, begins with a few words but gets frustrated, tears out the page and crumples it up. You walk over quickly and calmly and talk to him about his writing ideas. He chooses an idea and you suggest he just write a couple of words and then you'll come back over and check in with him. Michael begins writing again and is able to complete a full sentence.

    Tyler, a kindergartener, has been engaged and sitting quietly throughout the shared reading time. Toward the end of the book, he begins to fidget on the carpet and starts rocking his body side to side. You notice this and call on Tyler to come up and point to one of the words in the Big Book that starts with the same letter as his name. He quickly gets up and bounces to the front of the carpet.

     The most important thing to keep in mind is reducing the energy and restoring calm. If at this phase, for example, the teacher reprimanded Michael for tearing up the paper, or yelled at Tyler to sit still, it could easily have pushed the child into the acceleration phase rather than restoring calm. This is the critical time to be careful and thoughtful with your approach, especially with children who are prone to acting out.

      In summary, the most helpful way to deal with challenging behavior is to prevent it, of course. Paying attention to children's triggers and their agitation phase can reduce a great deal of problems.

It is in the acceleration phase when some teachers first notice a problem, because the child increases his efforts to engage the teacher - often through arguing, refusing to do what was asked, and perhaps beginning to push or kick other children or things. Once again, our goals needs to be to cool things off and calm the child down, even if it means ignoring some of these behaviors for the time being. The worst thing a teacher can do at this point is engage in a power struggle. This adds tension and intensity to the child's emotional state and will push the child right into the peak phase. Imagine the child's behavior as a run-away train. We can either help put on the brakes, or add fuel to the engine that pushes it into worse behavior. Here are some examples:

• First grader, Kaylie, is working with two other children at their desks, putting together a word puzzle. She begins to get frustrated when she is not able to take over control of the puzzle, whining at the girls, and jumping out of her seat. The teacher is helping children across the room and doesn't notice this until Kaylie yells at the girls, "I wanna do it myself!" and sweeps some of the pieces off onto the floor. The teacher notices this and asks her to pick them up. Kaylie responds, stamping her feet, "No, I won't. You can't make me." The teacher calmly approaches her and, with a neutral tone of voice, she asks Kaylie to come for a walk with her. She takes her to the hallway and suggests she gets a drink of water. As Kaylie calms down, the teacher is able to talk with her about problem-solving how to work with the other girls.

• Three-year old Jackson is playing with the blocks, trying to build a large tower. Mark comes over and places a block on top of his tower. Jackson screams, "Stop it! My tower", and the boy moves away. The teacher is in the art area, and doesn't notice Jackson's agitation. A few minutes later, Mark returns to the area, and tries again to place a block on Jackson's tower. Jackson screams, "Stop it!" and pushes Mark away, causing him to tumble backwards. The teacher quickly comes over and with a calm, soothing voice says, "Jackson, You've got a lot of blocks on that tower." She sits down next to him, between him and Mark and puts her hand on his shoulder. "It looks like you really want to work on this tower by yourself." As Jackson shows signs of calming down, she prompts, "Jackson, can you say to Mark, I want to work alone?" He repeats this and she turns to Mark to help him find another activity.

• Marco, a second grader, begins to wriggle on the rug while the teacher reads a story and asks the class questions. He begins to call out answers and his teacher reminds him to raise his hand. He continues to wriggle around on the rug, bumping into the children next to him. He calls out a few more times, but does not get the teacher's attention. He starts to poke the boy next to him who yells out, "Stop it! That hurt!" The teacher calmly asks Marco to come sit next to her, and she decides to get out individual white boards for the children to write answers on instead of calling on children to respond. Marco takes the board with a smile on his face. Later she will work with Marco on ways he can let her know when he needs a break from sitting on the rug at reading time.

     What do all these examples have in common? The teacher stayed calm -- in both tone of voice and body language. She redirected the child each time, rather than tackling head on the behavior problem. If the teacher had started to argue with Kaylie about picking up the puzzle pieces, or spoke in a harsh voice to Jackson about pushing Mark, or punished Marco by making him leave the rug, these children would have likely ramped up their own behavior into full-blown outbursts.

     The hardest part of this strategy is letting go of the idea that all inappropriate behavior must be corrected, punished, or dealt with immediately. When children are this agitated, the most important step is to cool them down so they can think and act more appropriately. The time to teach a child more appropriate behaviors is NOT when he is upset. When the child's anger is directed at us, rather than another child, this can be especially hard to do. With practice, being able to stay calm and redirect children's behavior during the Acceleration Phase will pay off in fewer severely inappropriate behaviors. You will also be more effective in teaching children appropriate behaviors to use instead.

     So far, we have looked at triggers, agitation, and acceleration in children's acting out cycle.  With careful observation and skills, we will never have to experience the Peak Phase of the cycle. Our goal should always be prevention. However, many children move rapidly through the cycle and we might be unable to intervene quickly enough.
     In the Peak Phase, the child is clearly out of control, perhaps kicking, throwing his body on the floor, screaming, and so on. There is nothing that can be done to prevent the behavior at this point, so the focus needs to be on keeping the child, other children, and property safe. Think ahead of time of a plan for out-of-control behavior so that all the adults in the room know how to respond. This is often the point at which we as teachers get very stressed - even frightened of children's behavior. Practice ahead of time using breathing techniques, positive thoughts ("I can handle this"), or other self-calming behaviors. The child needs YOU to stay calm in order to regain control!  Needless to say, lecturing, admonishing, yelling at, or threatening the child at this point will only prolong the behavior. Try calming techniques with the child, and if necessary, move the child to a safe place away from the rest of the children. The peak phase is usually intense but short-lived, if you don't add negative energy to it.
     As the child enters the De-escalation Phase, she will be more calm, and may withdraw or try to make amends. This is the time to get the class refocused on what they need to be doing and will lead us to the next phase: Recovery.
     Think of the Recovery Phase as a teachable moment. It's important to review what happened with the child and possibly with the class if there was a major interruption of their activities. Point out what might have triggered the meltdown, and make a plan with the child for how you will help her avoid triggers, or learn new behaviors for calming down, using words to express emotions or other needed social and emotional skills. And of course, follow up on your plan! I will share more ideas in later posts about teaching social and emotional skills to children as prevention strategies.
     For more information about the Acting Out Cycle, visit the IRIS Center. They have a variety of excellent, interactive training modules.

 [Adapted from Addressing Disruptive and Non-compliant Behaviors : Understanding the Acting-out Cycle. IRIS Center]